My daughters dating a black guy
Friends asked me what it was like dating someone who is black and giggled asking if it was true about “what they say about size.” One friend admitted “I could never date a black guy because I wouldn’t be able to understand what he was saying.” All stereotypes I had been used to hearing about this unchartered territory.When my relationship eventually ended, the phrase “once you go black, you never go back” rang in my ears.This is for the girls that have lived through the small-mindedness of a small town, and have been hurt by its cruel words, all because of who they loved. The color of your skin does NOT define you as a person, nor does it define you as my boyfriend, So to someone's old judgmental grandma, when I was out to dinner, sitting across from my African American boyfriend at the time with dreads and big muscles, I saw you stare at me.It's for the white girls who got dirty looks by society when you walked into a restaurant with your black boyfriend. I was in 4th grade when I had posters all over my wall and my friend asked if I would ever date Corbin Bleu. I saw you whisper to your 80 year old husband and him turn around and shake his head. Pray that you one day have a child or grandchild that has to live the struggle of being judged for who they date, not to be ruthless, but just so you can see what it's like. For the family that made their daughter stop hanging out with me when I got my first black boyfriend, I really hope you realize how great of a friend I could've been to your daughter, and that she definitely needed one with parents like you. Love them through the stares and harsh remarks; love them through the judgmental comments and hatred of the world. Where friends from home had laughed in my face, believing my taste in guys had somehow done a 180 as a result of moving to the city, black guys I currently went to school with were intrigued.I began receiving attention from darker skinned guys, one even proclaiming with a wink that he had “never had a white girl before” as if conquering a white girl is some badge of honor or just something to check off a list.He showed me new music, food, and gave me a new perspective to consider.
” didn’t become frequently asked questions until I began attending school at Towson University (TU) as a freshman. But the second I like someone with a different skin color, it's World War III. I have also met some pretty bomb white guys and pretty horrible white guys. If a brunette dates a brunette and then one day dates a blonde, no one freaks out, because it's none of their damn business who you're attracted to.After deciding to enroll at Towson University, friends of mine joked about me going to “the hood” and the violence in the Baltimore area, but I was never worried.
Fitting into this lifestyle felt more natural to me than living in Rochester ever did.
It put me in a box, limiting me in ways I didn’t realize until recently.